Darkie is leaving!

But no worries, she will be back this Friday. In the meantime, check out some of the links on the right side of this blog, and expect a massive post, complete with pictures of a moose, this weekend.

TechTrek @ UBC: Part One

This morning I went to UBC for the first time to take part in a Computer Science workshop for high school students. During my entire six-hour trip, I kept my eyes and ears open, trying desperately to remember as many details as possible so I can blog about it...now.

Global warming freezed my face off today. This coming week I will be skiing in minus twenty weather, you know, with wind chill and everything. But I doubt I will ever feel as cold as I did today, standing on the platform at the Rupert sky train station for a full ten minutes. As I stood on the quiet platform, no noise save the wind and the young woman talking in another language on her cell phone, I could feel the cold even underneath my jacket and sweater. I stared off to my left and wondered, "Why are Millennium line trains so damn slow?" I gazed briefly at the other people who were also waiting for the next train. An elderly Asian man, fidgeting on the bench and trying to stay warm; a large, bald man with a cane; the young woman, still on her cell phone, and who was now pacing the platform; several Asian women; my grandpa.

Finally, the train came and I rode the two stations to Commercial. Wow. For a Saturday morning, it was pretty busy. I'd never taken the 99 B-Line bus before, so the three massive line-ups for the 99 outside Commercial were quite confusing. Then the bus came, and I remembered about the loading method for such busy buses as the 99, so I left the line I was in and went to the first one. I don't know what the carrying capacity of this bus is, but it was super crowded in there. Until we got to Cambie and half the bus got off, my busing experience was pretty terrible- I was standing right behind the driver, holding on to the pole, and this man comes on in front of me. I move back to let him in, but I keep holding onto the pole. He's listening to his music and bouncing up and down to it, so I have no idea if he had any idea that he was squishing my hand. At one point, a lady came on the bus and as she squeezed past me, her purse went right into my stomach. It hurt.


This was probably my first trip into this area of Vancouver, so I got a eyeload of the big, pretty houses and cool shops in this area. At about 9:15AM I arrived at UBC. Now for the most difficult part of the trip: Locating the Hugh Dempster Pavilion in the massive UBC Campus. All I knew was that it was south-south-west of the bus loop. But since I apparently have no spatial ability whatsoever, I take off in the completely wrong direction. Go me. After walking around in what I think was a big circle, I decided to ask people for directions. The first two people I came across had no idea where it was, but third time's the charm, and the nice woman I asked happened to be going to the same place. Lucky me.

She escorted me all the way across the main campus and finally to the Hugh Dempster Pavilion. We chatted a bit, I told her why I was here, and she gave me some advice: Something about differential equations, something about algorithms, how Calculus is fun but has no real application in Computer Science because computer models can do it all, and how probability and statistics is more important. Or something. I thanked her and went inside to check-in.

As luck would have it, I picked up my name-tag from the table and they gave me a little gift: A bright orange carabiner with a time display and a compass. Seriously. I entered the partially filled lecture hall and sat down. No one that I knew was there, but the room was eventually filled with, mostly, parents and boys. I think there were about nine girls there. The lecture was very interesting and I learned a lot about how CS has changed how we think and solve problems. We also had a presentation from two guys who work at EA, and at the end they gave out prizes to those who could answer questions about the presentation and EA. The prizes ranged from pens, to laundry bags (?), to actual games. I didn't know anything, so I didn't win anything.


At about 11:10 we had a break. We were escorted into the lobby of the building across from the Dempster Pavilion, and there were snacks and refreshments for everybody. Twenty minutes later, we were led by volunteers, I think, to the "hands-on workshop." We got a taste of some basic programming with StarLogo, so for about an hour I busied myself with making my little colourful turtles run across my screen and make pretty, rainbow-rific patterns. I had a whole lotta fun, and we were dismissed at about 12:35. I also received a pen and a bunch of pamphlets.

Fortunately, I had little trouble finding the bus loop again. I managed to secure myself a comfortable window seat this time around, and thoroughly enjoyed my ride back to Commercial station. The highlight of this part of my trip was the variety of shops and restaurants that we passed. There was a shop called " .the butcher. " ...no idea what they sell; A cute and very pink clothing store with no apparent name, just a big, fat cupcake; and another meat store called, "Vera's Meats" with the tag line, "You can't beat Vera's meat." But yeah, I finally got home just after 2PM.

I had a lot of fun today and I learned lots, can't wait to go back to the next two sessions.

MMORPGs and Me.

How you and I can have our lives sucked out by video games.

I have played a variety of Massive Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Games (phew!) in my short lifetime. I've spent countless days and hours in front of my computer, compulsively trying to level up my character. Killing mobs of monsters, running through dungeons, selling items to buy better armour- it's all in a day's work in a MMORPG. Today I feel inclined to share and discuss some of these games that I've played or am playing, because I am a restless teenager who likes video games, and because I want to blog about something.

WORLD OF WARCRAFT.

That's right, WoW. This Blizzard masterpiece allows players to take part in a war between two sides, the Alliance and the Horde. You can pick from a variety of races including Orcs, Night Elves, Dwarves, Undeads, and of course, Humans. Depending on what race you choose, you can also be a Druid, Paladin, Warlock, Warrior, or whatever. Once you create your character you are immediately placed into the massive playing environment of WoW, and you can now level up, complete quests, gain new skills and have fun. There are plenty of new places to explore, from Zones consisting of lush forests, to snow-capped mountains, to barren, desert-like landscapes.

I first started playing World Of Warcraft about a month ago, and was hooked within minutes. It wasn't like anything I ever played before, and I thoroughly enjoyed learning how to play this game. My favourite aspect of WoW is that, unlike other games, the ideal way of levelling up is through the completion of quests. I love doing quests in MMORPGs, and the fact that WoW seems to have endless quests simply fills me with glee.

RAGNAROK ONLINE

This nifty game created by Korean GRAVITY Co. allows players to pick from a variety of job classes and has great PVP events. There's a storyline, I think. But mostly you just click around, spam skills, and level up. Dungeons are excellent training areas, but there are little to no quests.
Yes, I've played it. I've played a variety of private servers; My first RO experience was on Ragnarok Frontier, which had rates of 2/2/2. I had a level 7x Knight, I used a spear, I rode a Peco and my stats were pretty messed up. Regardless, I joined guilds and took part in the bi-weekly War Of Emperium events, in which guilds battle it out to gain control of a castle. My experience of Frontier was excellent; there was a strong sense of community and I learned how to play RO.
Then my brother, who often watched me play RO, wanted to try the game himself. I downloaded DarkRO for him, which was a high-rate server with custom classes and such. I never played on that server, but my brother seemed to enjoy it. Since then, I've played a number of medium rate servers. Next month I'll be playing on EternityRO, or at least I plan to.

MAPLE STORY

Oh, the joys of making your cute little character jump around and destroy monsters! Maple Story allows you to choose from Warrior, Mage, Hunter, and Thief jobs, and a whole lot of items, monsters, and quests. Though this game seems to be targeted at a younger crowd, people of all ages would enjoy the side-scrolling fun of bashing mobs of monsters with a group of friends. Also, fourth jobs and riding mounts just came out in MapleGlobal, so get playing!
I currently have a level 48 page, who sucks.




RUNESCAPE (?)

Yes, I'm serious. This game is great for the casual RPG players who do not wish to download a massive game file to their computer, as Runescape plays in your web browser. There is really no point to the game, the graphics are as simple as they come, and there is no way that you can screw up your character. You just point, click, and repeat. To keep up with the Internet tradition in which bloggers must humiliate themselves in any way possible, I will admit here that I have a ridiculously high level character on Runescape. And no, you may not have it.

Depending on how your brain is wired, you may find that these games are the most satisfying and fun, or you may find them to be wastes of time. For me, it happens that I enjoy doing the same small tasks over and over, so naturally, I like playing these games. On a final note, if you have time to kill, try playing some of these MMORPGs.

BTW, biggest monster of all MMORPGS = LAG.

Movie: Juno

Last Saturday I opted to not spend my entire day playing World of Warcraft (more on that on a later date), and instead went out for a day with a couple of my friends to see Juno. The outing wasn't my idea- I wanted to see Cloverfield, but I also did not wish to be the one, tiny girl in a theatre filled with college-aged men.* This was a rare occasion for me, in that I actually did not see the trailer for Juno until the morning before I left.



The plot is simple: A teenage girl gets pregnant, and has to figure out what to do with the baby. But the writing and acting is excellent; Ellen Page who stars as the title character is a phenomenal young actress and the movie is nominated for a number of Academy Awards. You will laugh, you may cry, and you can bring your parents along, too. Seriously. Just go see it.

*As concluded by the massive line-up on opening weekend.

South Carolina Primary

First of all, I would like to say that I disagree with pretty much everything that Huckabee stands for, but this former Arkansas governor is endorsed by Chuck Norris,


AND is a friend of my hero, Stephen Colbert,


Therefore, he is cool.

Anyways, the results for the South Carolina primary are in, and Huckabee managed to come in second to John McCain, with 30% of votes to McCain's 33%. His second place finish is remarkable because he pretty much has no money compared to, say, Mitt Romney, who has about $60 million funding his campaign and came in fourth.

Of course, one may argue that I only care about this particular primary because Stephen Colbert was rejected when he tried to get on the Democratic ballot last year.

This is a short post because I have a truck load of homework to do, including about six different drawings about the Canadian government that I may not post here. ;D In the meantime, keep up to date with election news with a satirical viewpoint at Comedy Central's Indecision 2008 blog. Very funny stuff.

Reality Shows Are The Sucks.

Reality Shows

Yep. Reality shows. They warp the minds of our children and weaken the resolve of our allies. As most of us live an increasingly sedentary lifestyle, reality shows are yet another reason for us to live vicariously through the people in our TV screens. Big and small networks alike are always pushing new reality shows onto the air, though most of these mysteriously disappear by the third episode. Those that do remain for more than one season spawn endless DVDs and other merchandise and become some kind of culture phenomenon. But why reality shows? And why are they so damn popular? Let's look at the word reality:

re·al·i·ty

1.	the state or quality of being real.

2.	resemblance to what is real.

3.	a real thing or fact.

Now everybody and their grandmothers know that 99.9% of reality shows are not real. Especially the ones where it's just a bunch of cameramen following people around, like "The Osbournes" or "House of Carters." Anyone who watches "House of Carters" deserves to be shot by Dick Cheney. If the masses are to have their brains sucked dry by reality shows, which, coincidentally, is happening right now, it should only be from reality show competitions. These reality shows are much more successful and are actually fun to watch. When I think reality show competitions I automatically think of CBS, which is probably the only major network I watch. I'm a fan of Survivor, Big Brother, and Amazing Race. I know that many people are huge fans of America's Next Top Model and maybe the Canadian version of the same show. I know that everybody loves to watch American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance. Dancing With The Stars, The Apprentice, Fear Factor, America's Got Talent, Last Comic Standing, etc etc- all other primetime reality shows that've become relatively popular.
While reality shows have somehow become the definition of this generation of TV watchers, we mustn't ignore the cons of reality television. Major networks- CBS, FOX, ABC, NBC, have probably all been guilty at one point or another of "recycling" reality TV ideas, or just simply pitching shows that make most of think, "WTF?" Sometimes, reality programs are just pure crap. How many dancing-related reality shows do we need? How many singing competitions do we need? Look at that one show, "The Biggest Loser" where a bunch of morbidly obese people compete to see who loses the most weight. Tune into NBC tonight to watch fourteen white middle-aged men and women as they sweat profusely and all their fat hang out while they're doing sit-ups and eyeing longingly at the bowl of ice cream in front of them! Way to capitalize on the obese people of America! What about that one show, where a bunch of young, arrogant wanna-bes try to become the next big soap star? Who even watches soap operas? The bottom line is, in this day and time, anyone of us can pitch some really random, maybe stupid reality show idea, and chances are it'll be on tomorrow at 8.

...

Darkie's Reality Show Ideas

• A bunch of TV producers are locked inside a house for a month and must come up with the most number of reality show ideas. Oh woops, nevermind, it's already done.
• Real World: Templeton Mini
• Fast animals, slow children. Wait, that was Peter Griffin's idea.
• Dance Dance Revolution: Contestants compete to see who can become the ultimate master of DDR!
• Guitar Hero: A spin off from Dance Dance Revolution! Same idea!
  
• Hunting with Dick Cheney!
• So You Think You Can Be President Of The United States?
• The Tooth Fairy: Contestants take on the role of the tooth fairy and must complete a series of missions that include exchanging children's lost teeth for money. The last person to not get busted by Dateline: To Catch A Predator wins the grand prize!
• Temptation Island: Homosexuals
• Dancing With The Stars In Space
• A group of death row prisoners get tortured, America gets to pick by what method! Text your votes to PAIN0 after the show: 01 for electric shock, 02 for the nail gun, 03 for car battery acid ingestion, 04 for the drowning pool, and 05 for the bed of nails. Whichever contestant fails to die by the end of tonight's show will win $10,000!
• Extreme Makeover: Planet Edition
  
• So You Think You Can Be A Suicide Bomber?
• America's Next Top Drag-Queen

LET'S HEAR YOUR IDEAS.


On a lighter note, remember Milo Turk and his song, "No Sex Allowed"?

Insert Generic First Post Title Here

This blog will be a collection of interesting, amusing, or bizarre things that I come across on the Internet, television, or elsewhere. Links and videos will be interspersed throughout stories and my own satirical opinions and reviews of various subjects. The blog will cover a range of topics from the latest in music to American politics, and everything else that I am interested in. My goal is to have fun and be humorous while practicing writing.